Deception of Self
Updated: Apr 6, 2019
Emeralda's heart was given to Yvan long before her story was told. She had no control of the direction of her heart but she tried to control her actions. The end result is a heart that pains for him constantly.
All of the men around her seem to be in different types of relationships but in spite of what her heart was saying. her upbringing did not speak to having an adulterous affair. Bearing this in mind, Emeralda tried to live by society's standards. However, she was badly hurt by the sultry darts aimed at her. Even though she was not having a sexual encounter with Yvan nor has he ever sexually exploited her, she was forced to listen to sordid descriptions from all levels of society.
At a time when social medias were almost non existent in our society, news got around like wild fire, whether fake or real. The social verbiage took its toll on Emeralda resulting in a withdrawn, distrustful version of her former self.
When Judas proposed to her, he knew that she still loved Yvan based on his overt comments on the topic. Emeralda however, in her emotional inexperience. thought that she might forget about Yvan. That has proven to be an impossible wish.
For three decades she endured humiliation and both verbal and physical abuse. She knew no one cared based on the circumstances that brought them together. He preyed on her vulnerability in order to redeem himself from the dysfunctional relationship that he was in. Both of them were to be blamed for their foolish decision. Emeralda learnt the hard way that you cannot create a scenario to hide yourself in. That's simply not how life works, situations must be dealt with not hidden away. They were both victims of love.
Emeralda knows that Judas wager on her being committed to the relationship based on her denial of her true feelings. For all these years she has been living a lie. On various occasions she tried to escape from her web but decisions have consequences. They both hated each other and Emeralda knows that he took pride in his ability to paint a different picture to the world.
Relationships should be based on serious commitments to one another. It should never be used as a tool for deception. Being used thus, would result in life long emotional scars with ripple effects on family members.
Emeralda advises anyone caught in a similar relationship to break free of it rather than allow it to break them. There will never be happiness in deception.